We all have one—an inner tyrant. The ego often plays the role of the tyrant: It prods and pushes, judges and evaluates. Its voice can be harsh, demanding, demeaning, and unkind. Or it can be rational, reasonable, parental, and authoritative. Either way, we tend to believe this voice and follow it. When we are identified with the ego, the Inner Tyrant plays a big role in guiding us through our day and—we think—making sure we get things done, and get them done right. We are convinced that we need the Inner Tyrant to keep up with life, without realizing that it is the one that generates the “to do” list that keeps us so busy.

The Inner Tyrant not only tells us what to do but when and how to do it. It devises a list of things to do and checks to see how the list is going: Did you do that? How well did you do that? What do you have left to do? Can you do it? Will you get it done in time? Will it be done well enough? Will you run into trouble? What problems might arise? How will you deal with those problems? The Inner Tyrant is a compelling voice because we really believe we need it to function. We really believe we wouldn’t get anything done if we didn’t listen to it. We’re so used to it that we don’t even question what it is telling us or whether we even need it. Where do its instructions and ideas come from? Is it wise? Is it true?

The Inner Tyrant is developed through the training we receive from authority figures, particularly parents. It is a composite of the authority figures we have known, which we have internalized, and other things we’ve learned. So now, as adults, instead of parents and teachers telling us what to do and when and how to do it, the Inner Tyrant plays the role of a parent or teacher or boss. This is a natural psychological process. The trouble is that, just as parents don’t always know what is best for us, the Inner Tyrant doesn’t either. It doesn’t have the wisdom to guide us; it’s just mouthing what we’ve learned.

We actually don’t need to have our conditioning voiced like this, since we automatically respond to life according to our conditioning. The voice is redundant and unnecessary. Like the ego, this aspect of the ego is a sham. It is an imposter. It isn’t who we are, and it isn’t wise; it only pretends to be.

That becomes obvious when you drop out of the ego and begin to live from Essence. When you live from Essence, you draw on your conditioning when necessary—you still don’t cross busy streets without looking or touch hot stoves. You don’t need the Inner Tyrant to remind you of these things. Once you realize this, you can ignore the Inner Tyrant, and when you do this long enough it eventually falls away. What a miracle! No more voice telling you what to do, how to do it, and judging your every move. No more going over lists and “checking them twice”! When we stop listening to the Inner Tyrant, it eventually gives up and disappears, although that doesn’t happen overnight.

The real problem with the Inner Tyrant is that it causes stress. Rather than being helpful, it saps the joy out of life. It keeps our attention focused in the mental realm unnecessarily and, therefore, out of the experience of the present moment, where true happiness and true guidance are available. It makes us less present to life, and when we are less present to life, we are less effective and efficient and less happy and at peace with life. The Inner Tyrant actually interferes with functioning optimally and with enjoying whatever we’re doing. It is not just annoying; it’s much worse than that: It causes us to worry and hurry and feel insufficient. It gives us the sense that there is never enough time and that we are never done with our “to do” list. This is not a state that is conducive to peace, love, and contentment, but just the opposite.

Fortunately, if you don’t listen to the Inner Tyrant, you will be guided by something wiser to do what needs to be done.  You also will be guided to do what is of real value, and you will make time for that: love, creativity, meditation, service, learning, growing, developing your talents, doing things that make your heart sing, and just being. In the ego’s world, there’s no end to working, striving, and perfecting. But we are here to enjoy life, to create, and to express our uniqueness and not just accomplish tasks.

Enjoying life doesn’t mean doing nothing but being present to whatever you are doing. Then, everything you do is infused with joy and peace, and you will be able to express love naturally. You will have the energy you need to do what needs to be done because it won’t be taken up in doing unnecessary things or in being stressed.

To begin practicing this new way of being, just start noticing the tyrannical voice in your head and recognize it as programming that you don’t need. Accept that it is there; don’t fight or argue with it, because this aspect of the ego is just part of being human. And then, just be present to whatever you are doing or just be. Life is much simpler, more joyous, less stressful, and runs much more smoothly without the tyranny of the ego.